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Photo: Fir 0002/ Flagstaffotos

G’day, possums!

Still haven’t achieved my ambition to bump into Edna Everage,

in, or around, Moonee Ponds.

That great Lord (or Dame) of Mis-Rule should re-appear, as

we all have need of an indigenous stalwart of comedy, a she-oak

of satire, in these topsy-turvy times, when the rule-book has been

torn up.

Yes, I am no longer Up Yonder, but am Down Under, escaping the

status quos in Europe and the USA, which seem to be presided*

over by Abbots of Unreason, Princes des Sots and other anti-

experts, who seem to be having a field day.  We might as well be

governed by the likes of Francis Rossi and Rick Parfitt, as our theme

tune seems to be ‘Whatever You Want.’

(* note the spelling, Donald.)

Bring back Boy Bishops!

Yet, this is no restricted time of daft usurpation, lasting till the 28th of

the month, when metaphorical steam would be released cathartically

and order restored – granted by some Saturnalian blood-letting of the

temporary ‘ruler.’

Yes, slaves becoming masters is no new concept. If you think nepotism

is novel, refer to Heliogabalus, who raised the women in his family to

senatorial titles.  He used cosmetics to enhance his appearance and

saw himself as the sun god, before he was eclipsed from public memory-

damnatio memoriae.  So perish all with such a degree of hubris!

But what to do while the black farce plays itself out?

Walk on Gunnamatta Beach, or Point Leo?

(You could still be sprayed by effluent from the discharge of over 40%

of Melbourne’s sewage from a nearby pipe.  The surfers don’t seem to


You could eat wallaby on South Bank- surprisingly delicious with a confit

of beetroot and pickled red cabbage.

You could gawp at what I call Vulgari jewels at the NGV.  Or enjoy a

confection of Kylie’s stage costumes by Dolce & Gabbana and Lagerfield…

There are plenty of distractions, I assure you. One can emulate Nero and

fiddle while everything is incinerated in a global bushfire to end all

international  infernos.

On the other hand, you might enjoy participating in Lee Mingwei’s The

Moving Garden, a curiously apt installation and piece of conceptual

socialism which takes you out of yourself and reminds you of the intrinsic

hope of human altruism and expressions of empathy.

The cynic in Candia has to overcome alarm bells at the memory of

Mao’s Let a Hundred Flowers Bloom.  Self-expression can be dodgy.

However, I felt constrained to write you a poem about this

meaningful experience, so be sure to read the next post!

Maybe there is hope for the future, possums.