Jimmy Savile’s chair and jewellery are going under the hammer today. I bet that his medallion will do well at the moment. I presume that it isn’t made of chocolate.
There is going to be a full moon tonight. If Wiggo isn’t victorious tomorrow, then he could always try howling and be placed in the lycanthropy section, I reflected. He might only achieve silver if Engelbert enters, but Hump. hasn’t done well in recent competitions.
Mustn’t be frivolous, I thought. The government said that the games would improve us morally. Yes, there had been a good example of this last night when the badminton match had been fixed and the crowd had shown their moral outrage.
I cannot imagine Andy Murray’s mum exhorting him to hit the ball into the net deliberately. The officials should send her over to South Korea and to China so that she can give these teams a good drubbing by sending in the chamberlains with the drugged possets.
Come to think of it, she could take in Iran on the same trip and could bang their heads together for daring to assert that they are only enriching uranium for peaceful purposes. You wouldn’t pull the wool over her eyes. Come on! she’d say- or even, Come off it! Still, interesting to hear the Chinese promoting fair play.
Lynne Truss- she of the Language Police-did some arithmetic on radio 4 to show that she was numerate as well as literate. She felt that four medals already bagged were not in the running to provide us with an estimated eighty five. Modesty is not to be confused with defeatism, she reminded listeners, as a kind of self-appointed morality coach.
Mind you, she has a point about some young people not being realistic about success. I have seen it all in schools. Kids will beat themselves up and their parents will beat teachers up-sometimes literally- if the world does not sufficiently recognise their offspring’s genius.
Gore Vidal, whose death has been reported this very day, said that failure was more important to friendship than success. John Bell of the Iona Community could probably take that up and run with it for a Thought for the Day.
The Rev. Joel Edwards underscored this concept by eulogising Jimmy Savile for loving his neighbour, in addition to running marathons. Andy’s mum might not agree: she is a medal biter.